I recently saw a meme posted on Facebook that I can’t get out of my head. It said, “I won’t have known true love until someone runs through an airport to stop me from getting on a flight.” I keep thinking about that because it is just so completely untrue. And it is part of a larger culture we have created about romance that I believe is wrecking marriages and setting up our kids (especially our daughters) for great disappointment and confusion. Here is what I mean: if a little girl grows up thinking of romance and love being only grand gestures and passionate moments and that is all she knows of love, she will most likely feel let down one day when she begins to experience real life. And it’s a shame because real, true love is such a beautiful thing and it has nothing to do with running through airports, even though that’s what we see on TV.
It has gotten me thinking about what I teach my children about love. I want to point out to them that they see evidence of real, godly love every day, all around them. The Bible teaches us what love is. It is patient and kind. It isn’t full of envy or pride. It is self-sacrificing and forgiving. And true love doesn’t give up and walk away, but NEVER FAILS. Those aren’t easy descriptions to live out. It takes a lifetime of learning and growing and we still won’t do it perfectly. I have been blessed with many examples in my life of this kind of love. I hope these thoughts will help you to recognize true love in your own life.
True love is…
getting up with the crying baby at 2 in the morning so your spouse can have a break.
taking out the trash without being asked
sharing dreams for the future
holding hands
making his favorite supper just to make him smile
shoveling the snow
taking care of each other when you are sick
praying together over your children
smiling when you see your love walk through the door
kisses before sleep
feeling safe when you are together
knowing each other's likes and dislikes
sacrificing your own wants and putting their’s first
sticking with each other through the hard times
catching each other’s eyes across a crowded room and feeling home
working hard day after day to support the family financially
inside jokes
working hard to keep the home to provide a safe, clean and comfortable refuge
encouraging each other’s gifts and talents
open and honest conversations
lovingly pointing out each other's sins
humbly admitting your own sins and being willing to do the hard work of healing and restoration
forgiving one another over and over again
clinging tight to each other and weeping together as you grieve
being willing to submit to boundaries and accountability in order to protect your marriage
laughing together
pointing each other to Christ
pointing each other to Christ
I know that each of you could probably add so many other things, and so could I. Let’s purpose to honor and celebrate what real love looks like. It isn’t always flashy or grand. It’s more often quiet and faithful. I want to be an example of that kind of love to the watching world in the way that I love my husband and my children. Because when others see that kind of love in us, they will see Jesus.
On a personal note, I want to say to my husband, Oran: Thank you for being such a wonderful example of godly love to our children. I'd follow you anywhere. :) And I love you more than I could ever say.
“And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is LOVE.”
Soli Deo Gloria,
Jessica
